At the end of last year, I made a resolution to produce more writing & improve my skills. I haven’t followed through on my resolution because I don’t feel motivated enough. I am plagued by doubts: what if my writing is not good enough? What if this blog is the best I could ever do with my writing?
As I write this post, I have decided to ignore my trepidation and just write. I have tried writing fiction posts on Tumblr based on prompts from writing_prompts blog. Regardless of whether my writing is liked by others, I will strive for a satisfactory piece by my standards.
However, the biggest hurdle for obtaining satisfaction in my writing is revisions: once I finish writing something or once I publish a post, I never want to revisit it. Its like my body is saying good riddance to my ideas.
Therefore, I will revisit my short stories & flash fictions from this blog & edit them. My plan to improve them is:
- Determine if the core idea is worth preserving. If not, I move on to the next piece.
- Determine if the story is worth revisiting or should I start from scratch.
- If I am editing the existing story, then I try to take care of the grammar & typos. Boy, this one seems like the hardest.
I have already started in reverse order: I opened up the first fictional story I wrote on this blog. Immediately I felt ashamed & repulsed by the soullessness of the whole piece. There was just nothing salvageable there. I moved on.
My plan is to republish Silhouettes on 5th March 2021. The original story centered on an idea that I felt connected to, it had an emotional core. In the original piece, I think I butchered that core. Not to mention the fact that the whole original story is littered with typos.
I know I am being extremely harsh on myself. 7 years ago, I didn’t write with any agenda: I wrote because I enjoyed it. I relished producing a story from an idea. I didn’t have an understanding of story structure, of character arcs. I just wrote.
Now, I want to write pieces which have a theme and the characters in them have arcs. I just hope that in two weeks, I can actually deliver a piece that I actually will like in another 7 years.