I know triggers now

Trigger Warning: Suicide

I was watching the second season of Ted Lasso when in one of the most emotional episodes, there is a mention of suicide. I gasped as the scene played out, I felt my heart beat louder. It took me a couple of seconds to calm down and I cried with the emotional moments of the show.

It wasn’t until I spoke with my counselor that I recognized that I got triggered.

My counselor said that with time, I will keep getting triggered by random things or memories. It is okay to let myself feel the wave of emotions again as with each time, I will get better with dealing with them. With time, the triggers will space out further apart and most days I will have nothing to deal with.

It was only because of that incident that I went back and added a trigger warning to my letter to Yuri.

I understand how difficult it can be, maybe not full extent of what others might feel when triggered, but I have an inkling of it.

I also realized that most of my blog pieces have just been about my mourning, My days are mostly good, I am still job-hunting although I believe I have almost landed a job. I am out of my mourning period, I think. Things are good.

But it is still feels like a punch in the gut to be triggered.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s