Closure

Trigger Warning: Suicide In the last couple of months, I have been looking for closure. Yuri passed away in lockdown and I haven’t met any of our friends since. In this waiting, I have pictured closure with visiting his grave. I think I want closure to look like this because his grave would be a …

I know triggers now

Trigger Warning: Suicide I was watching the second season of Ted Lasso when in one of the most emotional episodes, there is a mention of suicide. I gasped as the scene played out, I felt my heart beat louder. It took me a couple of seconds to calm down and I cried with the emotional …

Fond Memories of a friend

I started seeing a therapist because I want to know how to handle my grief and guilt of Yuri's passing. Most days, I doing good and then someday I feel the grief wash over me again. One of the few suggestions from the therapist was instead of writing about my guilt, maybe spend some time …

Grief three weeks on

Its been three weeks since Yuri passed away. I miss him dearly but there are no more tears.

To Yuri, my best friend: I am sorry & I miss you

Trigger Warning: Suicide My best friend of 4+ years Yuri Reid took his own life on 17th August 2021. He was 25 years old. I wrote this letter to him as I grieved. Yuri, Marlowe & IUmang, Yuri, Marlowe & I: 2019Yuri & I : 2017Yuri & Marlowe Yuri, I am sorry buddy. I lost …

Thoughts on a book: The Friend by Sigrid Nunez (2018)

Grief is a hard thing to describe and write about. It is, I think, comparatively easy to write about when grief is thick like morning fog or when it leaves a strong taste in the mouth. It, when coupled with depression, gets harder to describe as most often when there is no feeling. It is …